The Horny Unicorns acquired QB Phillip Rivers via a trade with ChoozyMomsChoozeGriff on tuesday night in exchange for QB Matt Ryan, WR Santonio Holmes and a beer to be named later. The deal will help both teams. Rivers immediately steps in to be the Horny Unicorn's starter upgrading their QB position, while Holmes upgrades a starting WR spot and overall WR depth for ChoozyMomsChoozeGriff. Ryan will serve as Manning's new backup QB.
After being drafted only two rounds after starting QB, Peyton Manning, it was apparent ChoozyMomsChoozeGriff had to be deal Rivers sooner or later. Rivers had become openly bitter towards the coaching staff over being drafted to backup Manning and was using the media to voice his displeasure. The two QBs had multiple verbal altercations on the practice field and the locker room was becoming divided. After monday's film session, Rivers ran to the bathroom at the team facility only to find the stall was completely out of toilet paper. That's when he reached his breaking point and demanded to be traded.
The Horny Unicorns introduced Rivers at a press conference late last night. Rivers seemed very excited to be a Horny Unicorn. "I'm stoked," he said. "To go from being somebody's bitch backup to the man on a team with this much talent is awesome! Hell, I've got a boner right now!" Rivers thanked the Horny Unicorns for getting him out of a stressful situation and now simply wants to concentrate on getting ready for week 1 vs Goin' Deep. "I'm so thankful to Mr. Yellabird and the entire Horny Unicorns organization," he said. "I just promise to work hard and be a leader on this team."
After ordering extra toilet paper for the team's facility, Yellabird boldly declared, "this team is playoff bound," calling Rivers the missing ingredient to bring a Bayshore FFL title to the already highly decorated former Toejammer captain. Question is, is there even room for another title anywhere on his mantle if they do win it?
5 comments:
yea the Rivers pick was questionable on my part...but i wasn't sure who will have the bigger year this year between him and Manning...i think Rivers has more potential to have a few huge games this year but Manning will be consistent week in week out.
OR I just handed the league over to Yella on a silver platter...haha
You sure that's not Steve-O?
If you mean Scuba Steve, he's Carson Palmer's twin/stunt double.
nah rivers looked like Steve-O in that pic
I now hope Yella wins...good job :)
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