Monday, May 31, 2010


"When You Go Home, Tell Them Of Us And Say,
For Their Tomorrow, We Gave Our Today"

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Red Rocket Report: Nobody Cares

Apathy reared its ugly head last night in Temple Terrace. It was "theme night" in Kickball Society with a $100 bar tab on the line. The defending Grand Champion Red Rockets were also the defending theme night winners. But the champs had more ideas than motivation. And in the end, looked to their favorite vodka for some inspiration: "fuck it."

The Rockets showed up with a heavily depleted roster and zero participation in theme night. The league all shook their heads and wondered why we had forsaken them.

However, it was "social experiment" night.  Captain Griff decided to REVERSE the line-up in hopes of letting the shitty kickers feel on top of the world. Ironically, this caused Maria to move from 7th to 8th, which undoubtedly resulted in a few "hhhhhhhh's," "what?!?'s," and "that's nonsenses." You just can't make some people happy.

The other team (Kick Ballz) did not reverse their line-up, and seemed poised for an upset. Some standard Rocket throwing errors resulted in a run, and there was no offensive production the entire first pass through the roster.  It wasn't until Zimbabwe Princess Teneille decided to actually bunt, and Gorecki decided not to pop out, that the Rockets got on the board with at 2-1 lead.

More dumb fielding mistakes yielded another run to Kick Ballz, and all hope seemed lost. But in what must have been the worst play in kickball history... Ruben kicked a 3-run "homerun,"... which was really a single with a throwing error at EVERY base while he rounded them all. Pure insanity.

Gorecki earned the Donkey Punch with his bases loaded 2 RBI double.  Nate earned the Gorecki for fouling out with runners on 2nd and 3rd (only one out). Teneille earned the Wendy for dropping a ball that hit her face and over-running another deep ball that allowed a run.

Final score: 5-3.
Reverse Order: not productive.
You: don't care.

Wednesday Kickball?

What is this?

Is anyone playing?

Horn.

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Red Rocket Report: Express Lube Edition

Yellowbird is doing his best Gorecki impression, and totally dropping the ball on these reports. So... Svedka! I'll write the damn thing this time.

Week 3:
Red Rockets Repeat!! took on Happy Endings in the slip-n-slide game.  The Happy Endings are a team led by Frank-N-Jeans, and have made some huge moves (literally) in acquiring Florian this off-season.

The Rockets made a few fielding errors, but the game was never close.  And errors are always present when getting hit in the face with water balloons.  RRR managed 8 trips down the slide, and HE's only 4.

Speaking of getting hit in the face with water balloons... the newly dubbed "Douche Team" of the league (Drunk Again & Looking to Score) decided to "help" out Happy Endings with their water balloon tossage. Come to find out... that includes hitting RRR runners point blank in the face.  The week before they had a little tizzy with the Rockets, after getting swept 7-0 in exhibition flip-cup.  Needless to say... SOME of the people on that time suck at life.

Final Score: 8-4 Rockets win!

Week 4:
RRR took on the Children Left Behind, which is a team made up of workers from the Tampa Police Department. I'm very surprised Ruben even showed up for this game (maybe he didn't know).  Anyway, they weren't very good and lost 14-2 in a game which was called early.  So it should have been a lot worse.

Nothing of note happened... except for Chandler doing his best Gorecki impression and dropping what had to be the easiest pop-fly in existence. This feat earned him the Wendy and the Gorecki. And a ton of ridicule, which caused a bout of depression followed by questioning if the game has passed him by.

Final Score: 14-2 Rockets dominate! 

After the game... it was flip-cup tournament time.  Here's all you need to know:
  • Kickball Society did "time trials" this year to seed the teams. Took fucking forever.
  • Drunk Again & Looking to Score (see: Douche Team) heckled both Red Rockets teams during the time trials.
  • Said Douche Team got bounced out in round one by a shitty Happy Endings team. Red Rockets all sang "hey hey hey goodbye" to them, which resulted in death stares and pouting.
  • Both Red Rocket teams made the finals.  Best of 5. Defending champ "Drunk Lunch" won 3-2.
Drunk Lunch

So there you have it. No lyrics. No anal lube. No nothing.

Kevin, go to your room!

RRR Game 5 vs. Kick Ballz @ 8pm TONIGHT! League Theme Ni...whoops!




VS.


Kick Ballz

Monday, May 24, 2010

Tim Tebow Biography

Whether you like him or not, this is some funny stuff.

Saturday, May 22, 2010

Friday, May 21, 2010

DPT Bowling - Week 3 Recap

Season rolls right along with some more shitty bowling by most of the DPT crowd.

Jim threw a 223 in the final game to cap a sweep of the Alcobowlics, who still have yet to earn any points on the season.  However, they do have some pretty kick ass bowling shirts now.

On the Beer Splits (Alley Gators), Maria and Chandler bowled out of their minds with a 139 and 191 respectively in the first game.  Sadly they fell apart after that... literally. Rollo and McNomNom filled in for Jared and Karen, but were pinned down by their average caps. Sean had a good series (181 average), but Jared's cap of 163 caused a 0-4 shutout (would have been 1-3 with no caps).

Of course, it doesn't help to go against one of the best bowlers in the league. Some dude named Dan went: 258, 181, 236.  Fuck that shit.

Anyway, out of twelve teams, DPT ranks 8, 9 and 12 (Alley Gators, Incredibowls, Alcobowlics). Horrible.

See you guys Saturday.
 Geoff sporting his new bowling uniform and wig.

Google Strikes Again




Well, there goes productivity in my office for the day. I'm going to have to start restricting access to google.




Click "Insert Coin" and you can actually play. I hope I am able to contribute to the demise of productivity in some of your lives as well.




Savannah Road Trip

When:  July 23rd - July 25th

Knowlty Poo Pants (remember him?) is coming out of retirement and putting together a summer trip to Savannah, Georgia. In essence, we'll create our own version of General William Tecumseh Sherman's march to the city. Not sure if there will be any arson, raping or pillaging along the way... but I reckon lots of booze will be consumed.

All are invited. Most are welcome.

The Facebook event link is here.  As details for hotels emerge, they'll be posted on that site.

Get on it people.

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

RRR - Winter League Grand Champs on TBO.com!!!

Time to get the ball rolling
By KENNETH KNIGHT
kknight@tampatrib.com
Published: May 19, 2010

TEMPLE CREST - On the job Tampa police spokeswoman Andrea Davis is a calm and focused professional, but every Tuesday after work she becomes a kickball warrior.
"Run, run, run," screamed Davis, jumping up and down as a teammate rounded second base.
It was the first night of the spring season, and Davis and her teammates on The Children Left Behind, a team of mostly TPD employees, were in a heated battle with veteran opponent Team Flugelhorn.
The Children Left Behind team played valiantly but lost its debut game 12-8.
But were they completely focused on the game? Could the presence of their nemesis, Blues on First, the veteran police department squad playing on an adjacent field, have weighed heavily on their minds?
"They wouldn't let us play" on their team, said Shar Ishee, coach of The Children Left Behind, laughing. "Now we have a pretty big rivalry.
"The other team thinks we are taking it too seriously, but we want to win."
Both squads are itching for the big showdown Tuesday night.
Tampa Police Chief Jane Castor is scheduled to roll the first ball before the teams square off at 7 p.m. at the sports field at Regnas Avenue and 46th Street in Temple Crest.

The rivalry is all in good, clean fun, said Kermit Kauffman, co-founder of Kickball Society of Tampa Bay. It is part of the excitement of playing in the adult kickball organization founded a year ago this month.
In its second year, participation in Kickball Society of Tampa Bay has more than doubled. The organization that launched with 16 teams in May 2009 has grown to 35 squads and more than 600 players.

The schoolyard game you played in grade school is making a comeback as a sport for adults.
Scores of young people, baby boomers, empty nesters and people from all backgrounds in the Tampa Bay area and across the nation are flocking to play. They are rediscovering the joy, physical benefits and friendships associated with kicking a large orange ball and trying to avoid getting tagged before reaching home plate.
Players start as young as 21. The oldest player on a Kickball Society team this season is 62, Kauffman said.

Kickball Society fields three leagues played at two locations in Hillsborough County. Games are played on Sunday, Tuesday and Wednesday evenings for six weeks before wrapping up with championship tournaments in mid-June.
The TPD teams are among 11 squads in the Temple Terrace Busch League, which plays Tuesdays at the sports field on Regnas Avenue. The Northdale Kickers and Northdale Champs play Sundays and Wednesdays respectively at the soccer fields on Northdale Boulevard.

On the first Tuesday night of the season, cheers and screams of support echoed across the field, where three games were being played simultaneously. Music cranked from a booming car stereo.

Third Base With Your Mom took down Blues on First by one run. Red Rockets Repeat!!, a new version of winter league grand champions Red Rockets Reloaded, were hot and ready to roll as were Huge in Japan and Drunk Again and Lookin' to Score.

"It's as much a social event as it is an athletic one," Kauffman said.
The leagues schedule theme nights and contests to offer players a chance to socialize on and off the field.

Jon Dunshee, 30 and a biomedical engineer, said the name of his squad, Team Flugelhorn, is a good example of off-the-field antics.
"It was a drunken mistake," Dunshee said laughing.
A lot of team strategy is decided over beers at Gaspar's, Dunshee quipped. The pub at 56th Street and Riverhills Drive is a popular gathering spot for the teams after the matches.
"We like to drink after the game win or lose," Kick Ballz captain Sam Coccia said.
A year ago, Sylvia Pankiewicz, 26 and a market manager at a freight center, didn't know her teammates on Team Flugelhorn, a combination of players from former Bushwhacker I and II teams. She now considers them close friends.
"We get together on weekends," she said. "Everyone has really been wonderful and super fun to hang out with."
Pankiewicz got her boyfriend, Joe Christophersen,involved. He is now the team captain.

The family-like atmosphere is a draw for parents with young children, said Rosemary Curtiss, who co-owns Kickball Society of Tampa Bay with her husband, Wayne, and Kauffman.
Kauffman and Rosemary Curtiss are former executives at The Tampa Tribune.
Such family fun may attest for the popularity of the game in the area. In addition to Kickball Society of Tampa Bay, two other adult kickball organizations, the World Adult Kickball Association and Tampa Bay Club Sport, have leagues in Tampa.


Hey Rowdies Fans!

Today's Groupon:

$14 for One Sideline Ticket to the Tampa Bay Rowdies vs. the Minnesota Stars at Steinbrenner Field on May 27 ($29.75 Value)

If you're not on Groupon, you can sign up here:

http://www.groupon.com/r/uu1455238

Monday, May 17, 2010

Ginnie Springs Bus Trip

If anyone would like to join this saturday in a Day Trip to Ginnie Springs via a Bus.

Details:
Cost: $60 per person
Date and Time: Saturday, May 22 from 8 AM to 9 PM.
Tickets may be purchased at http://www.d10society.org Look for the Ginnie Springs buy tickets link.

Price Includes: Roundtrip transportation on a coach bus with a bathroom, park entrance and tubing, continental breakfast, lunch, and an end of day dinner cookout. Beer will be provided during the bus ride to Ginnie Springs and "jungle juice" will be provided throughout the day of fun during tubing. If you are interested in bringing other beverages, please feel free to do so. GLASS CONTAINERS ARE NOT ALLOWED.

Guests must be 21 or over.


Sunday, May 16, 2010

There are a few good things that come from the ATL

So, I was spending some time in the Dirty South this weekend and came across this little gem. If you're ever in Atlanta and have a little time to kill, be sure to check out SweetWater Brewery. Some great beers and humorous names. Besides Donkey Punch, they also have Happy Ending, Road Trip and Motor Boat.




Of course, I had to purchase the shirt as well...the slogan is "You'll know it when it hits you in the back of the head."

Old Man Herbert

So Knowlton (remember him?) decided he'd tell a "creepy" camp story about the ghost that haunts Ginnie Springs. However, he was having the damnedest time telling it due to a severe case of the giggles. We sat through 10 minutes of this nonsense until I decided to start recording.

The beginning of the story (sans giggle interruption) was: Some old man name Herbert was wandering around the woods near Ginnie Springs... some random female camper goes missing... everyone thinks Herbert did it... he's on the run trying to avoid helicopters... "weird things" start happening.

Literally... that's 100% of the story up until this point.  Enjoy (and yes, it's too dark to actually see the stupidity).




The great story-tellers in history are all shaking their heads.  Oh well.  Fuck it.

Friday, May 14, 2010

Full Body Mustache


Buchanan, this look should probably make an appearance at kickball next season...

"Donkey Punch Toboggan" search results


So I switched computers today at work and did not have my usual bookmarks and had to do a quick Google search to find this site. I thought it was pretty funny and impressive that the first two results were this blog and more specifically the post titled, "I Guess Even Elephants Are Into Anal" and "Billy Mays Dead."

***Edit by DPT***

Below are ACTUAL keywords/phrases used in search engines which ended up in someone visiting the blog:

- "yellowbird kickball"
- "dickazzling"
- "does carly pope get her ass eaten in young people fucking?"
- "paige on the floor waka"
- "blonde in new era commercial"
- "dolphin and man 6 year relationship"
- "fist of victory sex toy"
- "macdinton's tampa history"
- "yoga position irish drunk position sex"
- "donkeynoms.com jeanette"
- "taylor swift porn" (this by far is the most popular keyword)
- "i have a crush on my abortion doctor"
- "ruined orgasm"
- "stop it ohhh"
- "when i pee it burns burns burns"
- "brie tampa bukkake"
- "do not put your weiner in a dumbbell"

There are also a bunch of searches for people in this league... but we'll just let that be for now.

DPT Bowling - Week 2 Recap

After the "baby seal" clubbing our two teams took last week, DPT eagerly hoped for a couple of rebound matches. Both the Alcobowlics and Alley Gators (Beer Splits) showed up in full force, complete with a handful of cheerleaders. Seriously... I think we had (once again) more people watching than actually bowling.

The 'Bowlics faced off with a team which tied the Gators in week 1. Surely they wouldn't struggle against what has to be the slowest fucking team in all the lands.

Wrong. They got swept 4-0 and are now the only team in the league without a point. Geoff was too busy thinking about his Atlantis vacation... and stunk up the alley with a 116 in game one and 117 in game three. E-Flo was decent and still maintains DPT's best average. Russ needs to contact TBCS to tell them they mis-calculated his average on the website (actually I just emailed the guy for him... nobody beats DPT's customer service). And April refused to break 100 in three games, showing resolve never before seen on the lanes.

-----------


Meanwhile the Alley Gators went head-to-head against the Incredibowls, which is the only team in the league with a lower total pin-fall.  Much to our surprise, it turns out Jim from the Shockers plays on this team (and plays quite well). He baby seal'd the shit out of the Gators with a 200 in game two, and 182 in game three. Since Jim has been an avid DPT lurker and pick expert, he will be added to our bowling standings.

Anyway, the Beer Splits won the match 3-1 thanks to some stellar bowling by Jared (who matched Jim's 182 in game three). Maria continued to improve and also added some consistency this week, probably due to those double-tall vodkas. Chandler sucked major donkey ass, yet remains the only one on the team to have never been "dropped." He vows to rub this in Jared's face until it happens.

In other news:
- Buchanan is off crutches.
- Your dick went straight to DVD.
- Geoff is going on a cruise.
- THEE Beer Nuts have still NOT invited you to Ginnie Springs this weekend.

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Red Rocket Report: Rockets Get Hosed on Calls, Settle For Tie vs Drunk Again, Then Demolish Flugelhorns & Impersonate Mexicans



Seven days. It can be a chore to wait that long for something. Remember when you were a kid and had to wait another week for Christmas morning? Can you go an entire week without a cocktail? Think Ruben could go a week without banging a kickball groupie or I could go a week without making a sex reference? Of course not, but now you're seeing things from the right perspective. And it shouldn't be hard to see why the Rockets couldn't wait to get back on the field and avenge the loss in week one.

Game 1 vs Drunk Again Looking to Score (And apparently the Ref)



The Rockets couldn't wait to lace up their cleats/sneakers/bustiers and dive into some hot, sexy kickball action last tuesday. They started the evening 0-1, a losing record for the first time in team history. Obviously, it wasn't going to stay that way all season. However, the ref in the first game (pictured right) seemed to have that idea in mind. Perhaps he had some pesos riding on the game.

After some creatively entertaining bad calls early on, the Rockets clinged to a 3-2 lead. Drunk Again would tie the game setting up one more questionable call to leave this one in perfect doubt. After all, the ref seemed more interested in whatever Ruben was saying to him or about him than actually reffing the game. Alicia ran for home, the throw came in offline from left field. Drunk Again's catcher grabbed it, threw it at her and according to outside reports, it hit her. The question was just did she make it to the plate in time. Guess we'll never really know and neither will a ref making close calls at home.... while standing next to the pitcher's mound.

The Final Tally

Rockets 3
Drunk Again 3
Anal Eaze 9
Missed Calls about 4 or 5
Threats by the Ref to Throw Ruben Out of the Game 2
Refs Who Had a Bad Game 1


Game 2 vs the Flugelhorns


Arriba!!!!

Now it was time for some good, wholesome and clean fun at the expense of minorities. It's going on three years since Ty banned us from participating in kickball fiesta with a mild political message about securing our borders and a major excuse to drink margaritas. Of course, I'm referring to the infamous Mexican/Border Patrol Themed game from several seasons ago.

This one had potential to be particularly offensive but I think we really kept it PG-rated for the most part. There was no lettuce, cabbage or tomatoes. Chandler had mentioned he might bring his lawnmower and I had mentioned the possibility of going to the junkyard and scattering old used car parts in the infield. It's probably in good taste that we didn't do either of those, but I was still kind of proud of my idea spray people backs with a water bottle for extra Mexican authenticity.

On to the game. The Rockets were getting sick of not winning kickball games. It was time for things to change. It was time for some Anal Eaze. So the Rockets lubed up, put on a big smile and drove it home for 8 runs in the 2nd inning. I don't actually recall but I think they scored first for a very brief lead and then we finally reached back and pimp slapped somebody. It was pretty explosive facial.





The facial was so long it seemed to make the game last forever. At least Matt seemed to complain enough about how long it was taking that it seemed that way. Kind of like when Nate visits the fat chicks at the Gold Spa and gets the hour long session. All that pent up frustration and tension has to go somewhere and when it finally releases, it goes everywhere.






Speaking of fat chicks, this Red Rocket Report is brought to you by Svedka.











It's tuesday night, you're alone at your local bar watching the game. You've been in a slump for months and need some booty. A fat chick sits down at your table. Fortunately, you're drinking Svedka. No other vodka makes fat chicks look hotter than Svedka. Svedka... fuck it!




So it was a pretty solid game. The Rockets poked their opposition in the butt, Ruben was not threatened to be throw out the entire time and everybody got pretty buzzed. Seemed like most tuesdays.

The Final Tally:

Red Rockets 13
Flugelhorns 3
Anal Eaze 87






Other Game/Evening Notes






"The Chandler" will be added to Taco Bell's dollar menu this summer. It's described as a fruity sweet soft taco packed full of large pieces of meat and dripping with creamy sauce.










The sex word for the week is the Mexican Avalanche. The Mexican Avalanche is when your receiving a blowjob near a stairwell, skeet in her hair and then push her down the flight of stairs.











Maria apparently drank too many margaritas and in true Mexican form was feeling pretty sleepy. She later took a siesta at the bar.























For kicking his first dinger of the season (and for having a rather large red wang), Souder won the Donkey Punch.



















For getting thrown out at home while impersonating a ballerina (again!), Ball/Rhyme Droppin' Gorecki won "the Gorecki" -- fittingly named after him.





















It looked like so much fun everyone decided to try it.












This week's Brooke Loves Yella's Karaoke Lyrics are taken from Carrie Underwood's "Before He Cheats"


Right now, he's probably banging a 3 dollar whore
in a bar bathroom stall
About to donkey punch her ass from behind
Oh but he don't know...

That the condom he wore must had some leaks
because I hadn't seen my period in over 6 weeks
Hungry every two hours and I just wanna eat
I puked my guts out this very mornin'
That bastard better pay for at least half of the abortion
Maybe next time he'll pull out before he skeets

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

RRR Slip 'n Slide action TONIGHT @ 8PM!!



**Game notes: Happy Endings has challenged us to a $50 bar tab to the winner!



Plus, following tonight's game:


**Winning team gets a $50 bar tab from Kickball Society!

Monday, May 10, 2010

Rays v. Massholes

Wednesday May 26, 7 PM the Rays take on the most deplorable fan base in all of Major League Baseball, and you're all invited, provided you don't wear red socks.

It'll be a Garza v. lackey matchup if the rotations hold true. Tickets will be around $18 pending transaction costs and the number attending. We'll sit up in section 318 or so where we can be just about as drunk and rowdy as we please, excepting those who might want to use profanity or yell about cultural stereotypes. We can't get that rowdy, but that's not even appropriate at kickball so I think we'll be ok.

The kickball crowd showed up strong when we did the block for the spring training game and tailgated exceptionally for the ZZ Top game, and I hope yall come along for this one as well.

I don't know if yall can find my email via the blog, but I'll try to set it up that way so you can let me know how many I should count you in for. And if you want to get on my mailing list for future occurrences of Rays game parties let me know and I'll throw your email in there.

Summation:
Rays v. Massholes, 5/26 Wednesday 7PM
Let me know how many tickets you want and get me money by 5/19
It won't be more than $18
Email me and let me know numbers

P.S. Chandler, let Knowlty know he's invited.

WAKA WAKA

Shakira mentions WAKA in her official song for the World Cup (Well not really, just uses the words).

Friday, May 7, 2010

DPT Bowling - Week 1 Recap

DPT bowling is underway, with two teams representing our dysfunctional group: Alcobowlics (aka: Alcoballics) and Alley Gators (aka: Beer Splits / Ligers).

It appeared there were just as many cheerleaders as bowlers last night, so thanks to those who came out to support us and eat shitty bowling alley food. True to our reputation, we also destroyed multiple pitchers of beer. But how did we bowl? For the most part... like shit.  Both teams were "baby seal'd" at one point or another during the night.

DPT clubbing


**Scoring:  One point per game (3 games). A final point for total pinfall of the 3 game series. Drop lowest score each game, but can't drop a players score more than once per night.**

The Alcobowlics had to play what might be the best team in the league, who averaged 179 per person per game! Basically they had no chance and got swept 0-4. However, E-Flo pulled a 236 out of his ass in the final game, which was undoubtedly covered in rice. This out-of-control score was the 2nd highest of the night.

The Beer Splits on the other hand won the first two games without any issues. Maria delivered on her promise to completely suck at bowling with a 55 in game one. She steadily improved on the night once we got some vodka (not Svedka) in her. For us to earn the final point for total pinfall, all we had to do was lose by LESS than 81 pins in game three. Despite Maria bowling what is most likely a career high 133, the rest of us sucked it up and lost by 103 pins. Baby seal. Dead. New fur hat. 


Individual standings will be kept on the side of the blog. The end.

Tampa Bay FC Rowdies Saturday Night

If anyone is interested, some soccer peeps are heading out this Saturday night...



Tampa Bay Rowdies vs Austin Aztex - 7:30 this Saturday Night

General admission tickets start at $12.00 and go up to $30 for the Tampa Tribune Deck seats.

Post game fireworks! Yay!

fctampabay.com ot ticketmaster.com to purchase tickets in advance.

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Off Season Thursday Blues??

Come on out for some pickup soccer/practice!






When: TONIGHT! Thursday (05/06) evening!

Where: Monroe Middle School

Time: 6:30pm


**So we don't crowd the parking lot, some of us are going to park our cars across the street (Westshore) at Camden Bayside (Ruben's apartment complex..ladies, you know where i'm talkin about) in the general parking area and walk over. So if you come late or don't see many cars at the fields, we'll be there on one of the many fields available!


Just say "I read about soccer on umm...Donkey Punch Toboggan?" and you're in. Just ask Todd!

Monday, May 3, 2010

Red Rocket Report: Rockets Blow Load, Then Swallow A Huge Load From Japan in a 13-9 Loss










It's Monday afternoon, I'm several days behind posting a RRR recap and my unadoring fansare probably wondering where it is. Not to mention I just found a half bottle of Svedka in the freezer. Write the recap right now or pour a glass of Svedka?? Is this really even a question. Svedka......fuck it.











My apologies for not getting it out last week. Between big work meetings and getting April moved into her new place over the weekend, I've been a pretty busy boy. Of course, having the bottle of Svedka nearby isn't exactly helping either. That said, here's a very condensed version. To my adoring haters, don't expect this to be a trend.










Basically we made numerous mistakes in the first inning to fall behind 3-0. Clawed our way back and built a 4-run lead. Only to forget that outs are recorded by catching the ball, the Rockets did their Bad News Bears impression and gave up a team record 9 runs in the last inning to lose it 13-9. Afterward Kelly rode off on his motorcycle, Buttermaker chugged a beer and Tanner was thrown in a trash can.







What's really crazy, out of the 6 or 7 dropped balls in the last inning, Ball/Rhyme Dropping Gorecki didn't drop one of them. One game does not a season make, but this one stung worse than a solid double tap.









Griff won the Donkey Punch for kicking the first homer of the season and driving in 3 runs.

And every member of the team that was on the field in the last inning shared the Wendy and the Gorecki. No pictures were taken unfortunately.










No lyrics or sex word this week, but I promise to make it up to you.

It's great to be a Florida Gator...

Make sure you use the arrows and click through ALL 38 photos...

http://www.620wdae.com/cc-common/gallery/display.html?album_id=228366

Try and compete with that Noles/Bulls/and Canes fans...

World Drinking Games

Some of you may have participated in this event in the past. I competed last year and it was a really good time. Lots of beer, lots of shenanigans, lots of beer...need I say more? Each team of 2 picks a country (real or imaginary) and does their best to disgrace the name of that country with typified stereotypes (think: Sumo Suits for Japan, Cocaine Nosejobs and Pablo Escobar for Colombia, etc.) while competing in random games (did they really say rock em sock em robots?)!

I posted the email and entry info below.
___________________________________________

From: Little Peckers
Date: Mon, 3 May 2010 12:44:56 -0400
To:
Subject: World Drinking Games IV

That time is upon us once again. Th World Drinking Games are back for the fourth year on June 26th, 2010 at Carmine's in Ybor City. The event has been a growing success each year and we look forward to another great event and lots of fun. There is again a 32 team limit for the event, teams of two, and the event will consist of beer pong, cornhole, costume, boot chug, quarters, rock-em sock-em robots, boat race, and paper, rock, scissors. The cost is $30 per team in advance, through the use of paypal, and $45 at the door. However, last year we sold out in advance so don't count on entering the day of the event. There is a link to the payal page on the Little Peckers facebook page or just use our email to submit payment. Again please email your top three country choices to us as those are first come first serve. We look forward to hearing from you all. World Drinking Games IVJune 26th, 2010Carmine's Ybor Citylittle.peckers@hotmail.com

Recap

Since nobody wants to post anything (Bayshore Baller recap? Rays tailgating stories? Losing RRRR? $150 bar tab recap? Jeanette dog update?), I'll just tell the world how golf went on Friday.

Location: Lexington Oaks
Group: Chandler, Gorecki, Buchanan, Geoff
Time: 12:45pm, Friday April 30th.
Weather: Overcast
You: A fuckin' ass

We spent the first 9 holes getting a feel for each other.  Every time someone had a good approach shot, the other dudes would feverishly attempt to get inside him. (GOTW, Nate?)

At the turn, I was leading with a 42. Buchanan was playing 9:15pm (LIGHTS OUT!) with a 43. Gorecki found himself in 3rd with a 50. And Geoff took it in the rear with a 52.  The group decided our current pairings were fine (Chan/Princess vs. Buckman/Heffy), and we'd play the "Low/Low Team" game on the back nine (this scoring system needs a name). As we did in the first half, everyone except myself would be awarded one mulligan.

Each team had confidence, but the tension was thick since Buchanan's shoulders were quite heavy from carrying Geoff. The patrons must have questioned if Ry could continue playing at such a high level. However, Buchanan/Geoff capitalized on some horrible play by Chandler & Gorecki on holes 10, 11 and 12. In fact, through 14, they had a 3 point lead with Buchanan coincidentally up three strokes on myself.

But in an epic collapse worthy of Jean Van de Velde, Ryan finished the round: quad, triple, double, double. I recorded two pars and two bogeys, while Mike and Geoff dicked around with a bunch of high numbers.

Final Team Score: Chan/Gorecki won +4 points (beers to be paid later).
Final Individual Scores: Chan (89), Ryan (96), Mike (105), Geoff (105).

So there you have it. Bowling league starts this week and I look forward to telling you all about it.

In all seriousness, a lot of people have asked about Leif's 3rd Annual Golf Tournament.  That will happen later this summer and all the info will be posted here.  So stay tuned.  If anyone wants to golf this Sunday, let me know.