Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Week 8 Picks

They're here. Don't make them shitty.

Closed.

32 comments:

Chandler said...

Ballics - UPSET ALERT! And I mean that in the way that HBHT could win. Although you could make the case that the 'Ballics winning is an upset. Either way... I think Teneille is broken or something so that'll help the defense. 'Ballics win by 3.

SuperBeCrazy - I'm probably stupid to not believe in PBC... but I don't. Supa is going to ground-ball their way to a victory. But PBC won't lose a game the rest of the season.

YLL - Finally getting to play some bad teams. As long as they show up with 3 girls, they'll get a victory. If not, they need to take a Tantrum Class with the Jammers.

Shockers - Nuts don't have the nuts. The combination of their fielding errors and the Shockers munts is just too much to overcome.

Jammers - Todd sent our team some rambling motivational email, to which I replied: "You can wrap satin sheets over a turd and spray it with Febreze.... but it's still a turd." Ruben wins all the subway points as the Ligers continue to pop-out, drop fly balls, allow line drives to drop in front of them, and throw balls away trying to peg people.

Growlers - Currently my vote for Crystal Pitcher. Solely due to bar participation.

Litman said...

Shut up Chandler, I'm not as fast as you but the balls I touch I catch.

Chandler said...

Haha. I didn't name names!!

FRANK said...

Probably going to be another week of the one difference in picks.. snooz. Lets bring on the hate..

Ballics- With the new shitty "non frank" layout and the advice from Johnny to go directly to the bar following your game,(Do Not Pass Go/Collect $200), I've yet to see HBHT, J'd up, or Guys Balls n Dolls play yet. For that reason, and their combined win total is 2 between the three of them, I got to go with gorecki and the aging asians in this. Where are all of the "M" theme pics?

Supa- Glad we got the primetime slot in this one.... I have to take a half day off of work just to make it in time. No spins, no theme, no fun Supa will douche it up for sure for the W. I punch out a ref, fresh off a spring break smirnoff ice bender, Matt P makes 12 errors in the first inning, and we get banned from GKB for playing our hippity hop rap crap after the 6:30 noise ordinance begins, instituted halfway thru the season.

YLL- Is it me or is this team filled with all of the players from previously failed and disbanned teams? Either way a team full of rejects is still better than GBD. Hate!

Shockers- This team is so douchey, that I actually like them, you know what you are going to get, and come to expect it, and that ugly purple looks kind of funny on serious douches.

TJ- If there was a "pitcher of douche" award, it would have the sweat and urine of Rubin in it, and would be sprayed out of Yellas rape dispenser on everyones faces.

Growlers- This could be the one and only year a team in a black jersey wins crystal pitcher. Screw them. Thats all I got.

!! HOT TUB PARTY TODD !! said...

Ballics – HBHT is talented, but since need some notches in their belt. They will probably lose confidence upon seeing the new Ballics’ team banner, and consequently lose the game.

Pitches be crazy – It will take at least a week for Sandra on Frank to come back to reality, this game will make that a little quicker. PBC is impressive.

YOU LOOK – The Todd has always been Green…. Really green. But it’s come to mean so much more this season.
By the way, that reminds me…. Recycle bins are back!

Shockers – are on such a roll this season that they might actually let Rob play.

Ligers – This week our captain Chan has sent out a flurry of emails out saying “We Suck” in just about every comedic-laced gimmick imaginable. We don’t, to which I replied:
“FUK THAT.
Betting drinks, one thing, subway points cards, now it's getting personnal.
This week is the subway classic, I challenged Ruben to a bet his: his subway card and mine on the line, winner takes all.
I got at least 2 footlongs in points on my card alone riding on this week, and I wouldn't have done that if I didn't believe the Ligers can beat anyteam they're up against, if any serious Liger team shows up to square off against a team of washed up Jammers that spend all their time whining on the Blog about pitching & throwing tantrums, this game is over in the first inning.
Half our phawking team is Huge in Japan, what more do we need. That's not even including Peter & Dave & Paige & I (soccer players), all of TJ's soccer players are cashed out. And we got Peter.
If I wanted to join a bunch of self-defeating pansies I'd tell David Caruso that Dollar Wells are back on.... this is Liger Nation, buck up bitches. This week is ours. Last year we had never defeated alcoballics, we crushed them in the first inning. This year we're better, and Peter's hair is longer.”
I don’t ever properly spell cursing because it makes Souder cry.
Subway Classic 2012: Ligers (Amber get her footlong).
Disclaimer: By the way, I never mean anything personal to anyone, I only named dropped Caurso because he’s the only I knew on either of Team Fab or Dollar Wells (sorry dude, it sucks to be on a bad team). And by saying “cashed out” is that TJ’s soccer players (Griff, Rubs, Termy) don’t play for the Ballers anymore (I wish they did), and the Ballers that stayed (Bito, Jordan) aren’t TJ’s anymore.

Growlers – whew, I’m done writing / copying & pasting.

7c7cf56e-7dba-11e1-a1b2-000bcdcb2996 said...

Jammers won't have enough girls to play. But still be aloud to win. That's my pick

DanPBC said...

HBHT vs. Alcoballics

It's simply, Honey Badgers don't give a damn or a f*ck about kickball. PBC is still offering a ginger and Alicia for the Asian chick on HBHT. Ballics squeak one out here!

SuperBad vs Pitches Be Crazy

I'm sure everyone including half of our team expects to lose this one. Not gonna happen though. Combine a fairwell ceremony to our Asian with Ginger, Deek sweat, and Blue berry cobbler and the outcome is a sloppy win! It's amazing we find ways to win even though Alicia continues to show up.

YLLINAD vs G,B,&D

Damn it I hate the Green teams name! G,B,&D let the forfeit slip away last week. Looks like its an O-fer season! YLLINAD wins despite the name.

TBN vs Shockers

As long as the Shocker girls show up with plenty of lubrication they will have no problem handling a Beer Nut. Shockers win!

ToeJammers vs. Ligers

The trouser snake is full of voodoo juice for this 8:45 kickoff. I'm overwhelmed with emotion in this game. I'm forced to pick against my Blue Berry cobbler loving friends. Loser takes a pie to the face. TJs win!

Jacked Up vs. Growlers

The league can only hope the Jacked Up ladies decide to do body paint theme this week. I under estimated the sex appeal and nearly let them steal a win last week. I'm pretty sure a Growler is gay so batting lashes and shaking asses will not provide any assistance this week. Growlers win!

Mabancroft said...

HBHT vs. Alcoballics

In a battle of who can make the most errors and flat out stupid plays on defense, the ballics find a way to lose this battle but win the war. Ballics win a close one.

SuperBad vs Pitches Be Crazy

CJ still finds a way to pitch sidearm and get called strikes even after being warned by the referee that it is now (still?) illegal to do so. Frank returns with 10lbs more throwing power and puts it to good use. Superbad Wins.


YLLINAD vs GBD

Ricky Ricardo called (from the grave). Apparently they are looking for a new co-star for a re-make of the I Love Lucy Show, and the original Ethel is locked down in purgatory. Lucky for us, GBD's Captain Ethel is ready for the big stage. However, with the distraction of stardom looming for GBD, YLL shows no mercy and rolls to an easy win.

TBN vs Shockers

Nate forgets the belt at home(their good luck charm?), and has forgotten what it feels like to take a good old fashioned ass whoopin. He'll remember both next week. Shockers win big.

ToeJammers vs. Ligers

In the bottom of the first inning (Ligers will be home team cause Jammers can't chug for shit) TAHM fails to throw Chandler out, loses his shit, and has to be asked to leave the fields because even our pot smoking spectators get a little uneasy (we have the late game so there should be plenty around by then). In his absence, TJ's realize that kickball really can be fun and roll to another victory.

Jacked Up vs. Growlers

In a mid game rule change, Jacked Up will have any of their runs scored wiped clean and the Growlers roll to a shutout victory.

JD said...

Alcoballics over HBHT.....Robin from Honey Badgers is badass, but she can't carry her team against the veterans.

Supa over PBC......I appreciate Dan's optimism, but we've come from behind in the last inning in 4 of our games and 2 of them with Michelle (officially became the slowest person on Earth last week, congratulations Alicia) running the bases. It's a sad day for us, because it's the last game for one of our original players, John. We'll screw this up in glorious fashion in his honor.

YLLINAD over Guys & Balls.....Guys & Balls might be the worst kickball team I've ever seen, but they don't care. Chandler said YLL is upset, because I said something unflattering about them last year. I should be more sensitive to their feelings. The honorable YLLINAD squad will win a noble battle over a team close to death.

Shockers over TBN.....Shockers are on a roll. Disagree with Frank, because they weren't douchey when we played them. You know what other team is in no way douchey?????? YLLINAD.....all quality individuals.

TJ's over Ligers.....can you get 2 teams more polar opposite in their outlook on kickball? Is Todd giving Yellow a serious run for Creepiest Player in the League (CPL)? Will Chandler get Johnny to change the rules in the 3rd inning forcing any teams wearing yellow to run the bases backwards? Will YLLINAD ever love me? So many questions.....

Growlers over JackedUp.....JackedUp really should have beat us last week, because we were REALLY distracted by the hot blondes on their team....or the half-naked black guy in pointy shoes. Monius impressively held an erection for the whole game, although not as impressive as the erections on YLLINAD.

Litman said...

Ballics- They are doing a theme night again, this week it's called 'winning'
SuperBad- Strictly because they have only allowed 9 runs compared to 25 runs allowed for PBC. Deep down I'm rooting for an undefeated season from PBC but I've already lost way to many beers this season despite having at least 2 weeks of perfect picks.
ABCDEFG- wouldn't it be fun to have an undefeated team AND an winless team in the regular season and have PBC upset in the first round of the tournament?
Shockers.
Jammers- us ligers have had a had time scoring runs recently. I'd like it to change but we will probably be out scored again
Growlers- the will also score more runs then jacked up.

Chandler said...

Great commentary so far. Love the Jacked Up body paint theme. That needs to happen. We can bring water balloons.

Smooty said...

Ballics
SuperBad
YLLINAD
Shockers
Jammers
Growlers

Fat Kid said...

Ballics- If all of HBHTs players ever showed up, then they would a good team, but since you never know, i have to go with the ballics.

Supa- PBC is having a magical year, but CJs beard is like an evil growth and will consume the DeeksweaT. Ya that rights, DeeksweaT in creepy beard, picture it, embrace it, lick it....

Green Team- if the old team cared about winning, i would feel bad for them, but they are out there to have fun (what is that?) so as long as teams arent douchey to them (TJ Matt) they are are good with it losing. Plus, if anyone needs a DUI attorney, old man pitcher is Ty Trainer, a beast in the courtroom. *Side note, does green team pitcher know he can't be awesome anymore with the "enforced" rules???

Shockers- i dont know what changed between last year's Nutz and this years nuts, but its terrible.

Jammers- Thanks to all the bulletin board material by HandJob, Jammers use BioFreeze extra early and take there one-a-day vitamins, game is over in the 1st inning and fat kid gets a footlong, boom! *Sidenote Fatkid bet Asshole TJ Matt that he CANT throw out Salt and Pepper Chandler (grey hair, get it? good)should be a good slow motion sequence between two really old guys. Chandler, take off the Depends they will restrict your running abilities.

Growlers- dont know anything funny to write about these teams.

Chandler said...

Just tell Ruben to throw me something I can munt.

Also... is that old guy really Ty Trayner?

Nate Dawg said...

Sorry for no commentary...great ish from everyone else though!
HBHT
Supa
Greenies
Shockers
Jammers
Growlers

Nate Dawg said...

Didnt think about HBHT playing the early game. Change my first pick to the Ballics. I think the squad we played last week would beat them though. Not really sure where everyone is getting that TBN is terrible this year. Only given up 12 runs all year (near the tops in the league) and we have played every team close that we have lost to. I will admit we arent great but we arent terrible either.

Fat Kid said...

old guy really is ty trayner*, the wifey pointed him out to me from her days in the courthouse. Also, cough cough, we had some members of our team use his services in the past haha. and Nate, i didnt mean to butt hurt you. The Nuts are terrible (charles barkley voice).

Fat Kid said...

typo* arent*

Chandler said...

Yeah there are a lot of kickballers who have used his services.

Nate Dawg said...

There are probably some kickballers that need his services...

No worries Christian, just defending my team. And fuck Charles Barkley. We are medicore and proud of it!

Fat Kid said...

and dont forget the proud owner of the BeerJam belt (for another week at least)

Jess said...

HBHT v. Ballics
I think this one could go either way but a mid-game rule change (which I championed) will deem any team whose name references a viral internet video ineligible to play.

Superbad vs. PBC
PBC is winning until the 7th inning when I walk up to Johnny and convince him that no team in the league should be allowed to be undefeated. Since he obviously listens to me when I *cough*Chandler*cough* complain, he instigates the rule mid-game and for once, PBC is the one losing the game at the end.

YLL v. GBD
Since my evil, diabolical, trouble-making plan to recap a game about a blown call and have it turn into an all out bitch fest about a completely unrelated topic has worked (muwahahaha), the YLL pitcher is rendered useless. Somehow, though, they still manage to get the win.

TBN v. Shockers
Shockers win because Fast Fucker Chris on TBN is feeling sickly and I make him stay home from kickball today. That’s in the rules somewhere, right? If not it should be - Johnny, get on it.

Jammers v. Ligers
Jammers are fed up with all this whining and complaining! In protest, they decide to forgo having a pitcher at all and just place the ball on home plate instead. But Chandler and half his team are too concerned about getting home to watch DVR’d coverage of the Masters that they lose the game, despite Hand Job ‘s concerted efforts to have the outcome turn out otherwise. Rex Ryan sticks around to take over Teneille’s pedicure duties.

Jacked v. Growlers
This should be a fun game. Jacked up is fun. We’re fun (I think???). And to top it all off, the mid-season rule change banning bitching during the games brings it to all time high on the fun scale. Or maybe it’s just a high from all the doobies Deeks' family is smoking. Either way, we win a close one and everyone has a smile on their face.

Nate Dawg said...

Christian...yes might burn it this weekend haha. Nah I'm just happy we won it once. You guys can have it back...gonna have to earn it though!

Fat Kid said...

btw, speaking of trini, i still haven't touched my toes waiting on her to come through with her bet. Im contemplating buying some bigger shoes since i cant wear my old ones due to increased length of nails. damn u teneille!

Nate Dawg said...

Sorry Jess just spoke to Faz and he is coming tonight. I told him I dont care how sick he is, he better be at the fields!

Griff said...

Ballics vs. HBHT -
Summary of the curious case of the 'ballics' season:

FB post from a female GKB player last Thurs: "Wine sample night at the grocery store tonight. I will be here every Thursday!"

Griff: "I thought you played GKB on Thursdays (with the 'ballics)?"

Female GKB Player: "Griff - I played one game and couldn't handle it. When I play sports it has to be competitive or it is not fun for me :)"

Griff: "I think I just heard you say "sooouuulll glllooo"!!"

Now former GKB Player: "Griff that whole league isn't for me."

EURIKA! They have successfully shunned away competitive players after just one game, and now even the Toejammers can't convince her to play! HBHT's odds keep getting better and better, but I still think red will win this one solely because they still have a few more ringers to weed out. Ballics win.

Supa vs. PBC -
Fun Fact: PBC would be in danger of their 2nd loss of the season tonight had Soul Glo NOT let them start the first inning of our game shorthanded. Apparently PBC should be grateful of this generosity as it was not in "fairness to the game". But I digress. Shame this Prime Time matchup has to be the early (ish?) game this week. Even though CJ may struggle with the pitching change, Supa always brings their "A" game when faced with a formidable foe. This one will be a low-scoring slugfest between two excellent teams, (much to the chagrin of Silver Fox) but even a portly Frank makes a better Superbad than a Superbad with no Frank at all. HYPE!! Supa wins.

YouLookLikeYou'llNeedMoreDefenseNowThatYourPitcherCan'tKeepYouInGames vs. G,B& D -
The rest of this season became "not so easy" for the Greenies now that their biggest defensive weapon has been neutralized. Guys and Balls won't expose this paper defense yet, but a couple other teams might soon. Greenies win.

Shockers vs.TBN -
I haven't seen a GKB Gameday post in a while, so I have little insight to how this will go. I think Robbie's Shockers will edge out TBN because I can't think of the last time they've lost to TheeBeerNates. I DO remember a 4-4 shootout tie last season though... shockers win...barely.

TJ's vs. Ligers -
Handskie Todd's pregame motivation email was certainly inspiring...if he still played for Balls & Dolls. Good thing Silver Fox is on damage control to maintain the Liger "you should count us out because we play for fun anyway" credo. Even Rex Ryan admits he was in town just to recruit this Peter guy for the backup QB job... Soul Glo wins.

Growlers vs. Janked Up -
Some good lookin ladies in this one...Growlers pull this one out with some feisty sliding techniques and a renewed sense of optimism from their big win/lollipop social last week. Growlers win.

Smithkey said...

Smithkey's special guest pics. Well I have not made a pic this season, seen a game, or even play in the league this season but think I will stop by the bar tonight so mine as well make some fucking picks so here it goes.

HBHT This pick will probably cost me some beers but the Ballics are old as shit and I am sure Gorecki still drops balls. HBHT wins in an upset.

Supa What the hell happened in my one season of absence that PBC undefeated and on top of the power rankings. I am not buying it. Superbad is a team of seasons vets and will be damned if they let PBC go undefeated and I'll be damned if I pick them.

ABCDEFG I remember the greenies as a better than average team and have no clue who GDB is and judging by their record neither does anyone else.


Jammers TJ's might be old but they are also pretty stacked and take this shit serious. 2-a-days have kept the arthritis from flaring so they will be on top of their game tonight. Ligers are still a .500 team but has just gotten lucky early in the season. Their luck runs out tonight

Shockers Some things never change. Shockers will always be a good team and never great, TBN will always be a bad team but never really bad.

Growlers That is all

Jess said...

Those lollipops were great! The best was when a Liger girl thought she was safe at first and grabbed a lollipop. Then she got called out and gave it back because I guess she thought she didn't deserve it? lol

Nate Dawg said...

The lollipops werent even being given out correctly! Mike and Ninja got one for fielders choice's...so they were really just participation awards.

JD said...

Griff,

Anne did make it before the game started (she pitched the first inning), but y'all were willing to let us play with 3, as we did with YLL. It's rediculous to think anyone would force a forfeit....it's KICKBALL!!!! If you really care that much about wins and losses in an social/drinking KICKBALL league, I really pity how sad your athletic career has been to this point. With that being said, I put bounties out with my team on Harvey, Missy, Drew, Franksandra and anyone named Cigarran. Win, lose or tie....someone will bleed.

Alison said...

Honey Badgers Hit That v. Alcoballics
This game is just asking for an upset. The Ballics are the veteran team and should beat the Honey Badgers. However, the Honey Badgers aren’t the slacker team that they started off the season as. They have the fasts girl in all of kickball and I predict that this will be a very close game. The winner will be the team that makes less errors tonight. Ballics?

SuperBad v. Pitches Be Crazy
I’m riding the undefeated PBC train until that runs out of track! Another upset potential, though…definitely could go either way. Supa will play it close--especially since Frank is back with those movie star good looks to inspire his team. Deeks uses a different motivational tactic letting Lucifer loose on the weak and slow members of his team. Luci licks his chops after devouring some of those crazy pitches giving the rest of the squad just the right motivation to get around the bases.

You Look Like I Need A Drink v. Guys, Balls & Dolls
Now that the Chili Peppers have left the building YLL will show up this week and dominate GB&D. They will also dominate the GB&D chicks on hotness! Woohoo!!! Other than the blowout that’ll occur here GB&D will have a better time than last week playing against those meanie Jammers. Ruben is still out at third! Yours truly schooled the GB&D pitcher last week about not stepping over the rubber and to stop walking up on the ball. He had apparently actually read the GKB corporate rules and wasn’t aware via his captain Ethel Mertz (who was present at the captain’s meeting) that we had amended this rule for our league. Makes sense that he read them now that we know what he does. He’s kind of famous in our league.

THEE Beer Nuts v. Shockers
I kind of expect both teams to have a pre-game conference about pitching style and agree to let each other pitch competitively. The ref says no, TBN and Shockers combine forces on this issue but still don’t prevail. Everyone starts the game off mad but TBN gets to crushin’ brew and end the game happy. But losers. Because Shockers are gonna take this game.

ToeJammers v. Ligers
The Jammers are great base runners and have a lot going for them this week. They take out their pitching rule frustrations on the Ligers and Todd has to give up his Subway points to Ruben. Peter goes over to play with the Jammers after one too many Hand Job hugs. None of the other Ligers blame him. The Liger chicks are annoyed that Rex Ryan didn’t visit them so to protest they stand around in indifference. It ends up helping. When the Ligers see that the Jammers have chicks in the outfield who can catch balls over their head while running backwards (WTF!) they are left to look more like Tigons and the Jammers walk away to Temple Terrace with the W tonight.

Jacked Up v. Growlers
The hot blondes on Jacked Up use their best distraction techniques against the Growlers but it ends up backfiring. All the men in GKB line up to watch their game and end up getting in JU’s way on the first baseline. Jess complains her team into paying attention and gets the drooling men off the base lines leading the Growlers to victory. A feisty and good time is had by all.

Alison said...

The fact that the lollipops were being given out to everyone just makes it better. LOL