Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Week Whatever Picks

CLOSED

5 maybe? Get them in by 4pm on Thursday. Write commentary because we are playing this week. Pick at least one of the following upsets:

Moundpounders
Alcoballics
Ligers

Shit, there are actually a lot of good match-ups this week. But whatever.

33 comments:

J.W. said...

OC v Jammers

It's been a loooong time since the OC has played the Jammers. So long, in fact, that I think most of the old guard Jammers were taken away by the Cocoon aliens from their retirement home and have since been replaced by new and allegedly improved players. No matter, the OC is always improving and with a pretty full squad expected to be there for the first good weather game of the season, look for the OC to treat the Jammers like Eddie Murphy treated Samuel L Jackson in Coming to America. Soul Glo represents everything that was wrong with the African American culture in early 80's Brooklyn, by the way. Racist scumbags.

Jacked Up v Pitches Be Crazy

Jacked Up is coming off their biggest win since... well, ever. They will tell their grandchildren about the time they defeated the mighty OC and their grandchildren won't even believe it happened. I still kind of don't believe it. That said, Jacked Up beating PBC can be fully comprehended by anyone.

Growlers v JatM

Do we have an official acronym for Jose? Is it JaMP? At least that kind of spells a word. I think I'm going to just go with that now. It would be great if I could pick Jose to Pound the Mound against a team called the Growlers, but the Growlers seem to have remembered how to play kickball. They'll win by a lot.

Ligers v Superbad

I haven't seen Superbad play at all this year, but I do know that Summer Festizzle is coming up this weekend, and just in time for the fall weather, too. Did you use Frank's random machine for choosing the date, Missy? That thing never seems to work. Neither does the Liger defense. Superbad wins by a lot.

Shockers v Ballics

So, by process of elimination, you know that this has to be my upset pick of the week. Quite frankly, though, I think the Shockers are just due for a loss anyway. This beginner's luck bit is getting old, and the veteran Ballics will finally get the rookie Shockers into the loss column.

TBN v SoMB

I was going to get a good chance to scout TBN last week until God decided to play one last joke on us and re-flood the field. It feels like this is Crazy Old Testament God these days. Noah would have been the only one to survive this fall kickball season. Anyway, I'm going to take SoMB in a minor upset here because Nate's due for some bad luck after the call in the Braves game the other day and the Rams having actually won football games this season.

So, there are my picks. Looking through them, I have a decent shot at being the first ever 0-6 picker. I don't think Caruso was even able to pull that off.

Happy kickball, everyone.

Caruso said...

OC
Jacked Up
Growlers
Ligers
Shockers
TBN

I picked just for JW.

J.W. said...

Haha. Good luck, Caruso. I hope you're right this week on that first pick.

Mabancroft said...

The following game pick were paid for by Raising Kickball Leaders of America.

OC v Jammers

I don't think I've seen OC play a kickball game all season. As a matter of fact I don't think I've seen much kickball being played at all this season. Do I need to see OC play to know that the Jammers beat off constantly? We have Ruben on our team. Is that even a question?

FACT: Jammers Win

Jacked Up v Pitches Be Crazy

Have I see either of these teams play kickball this season? Nope. But as long as Deeks sweats, PBC wins, and I hear there is a 100% chance of humidity.

FACT: PBC for the win.

Growlers v JatM

Do I know what JaTM stands for? Nope. Can't be any worse than TAHM though. Fellow abbreviated names unite! I'll take the upset here.

FACT: JaTM wins?

Ligers v Superbad

Am I disappointed that the Jammers and SB couldn't have their random funsies game last week? Yep. But I will be looking forward to the Monday Night Kickball clash of the douche-bags. That aside, SB has had an extra week to make their lineup extra random.

FACT: SB has another random win.

Shockers v Ballics

Have I seen the Shockers play kickball this season? Yes I have. They looked pretty damn good. And they played kickball well too. Have I seen the Ballics play kickball this season? Only because we played them.

FACT: Shockers win big.

TBN v SoMB

Is Nate still mourning the FSU debacle from Saturday night? I would be. That was pathetic. While any normal human being might look elsewhere for the spark the reignite the desire to go on living, Nate will have to settle for the victory this week.

FACT: Friends don't let friends commit suicide over college football. And we're all friends here, right?



I'm Fact Checker and I approve this message.

Litman said...

Jammers- I'm sure these guys are still let down after settling for a tie and losing their undefeated season so early. George Bush comes in and gives a motivational speech...."lets roll"

PBC- These guys gotta get off the schneid sooner then later. Do you guys have a full team of your men showing up yet?!

Moundpounders- Required to pick an upset.

SupaBad- This one will probably get pretty ugly as a few Ligers are still coming off a hang over from Ginnie Springs, one of them is still looking for pieces of his truck, and there will be debates of what can be recycled and what can't. Also, the Liger shorts are making their first appearance at the fields and I'm sure there will be a debate amongst the women who has the best legs. Supa wins 9-2

Shockers- They beat up on the Ballics and Thee Todd get's mad because he's not on their team yet.

TBN- They take out their frustration of seeing me in jorts and a thong at Ginnie most of the weekend. Sorry I don't remember driving up to your camp site on Friday....that was stupid of me, I know.

Chandler said...

Jammers - OC struggles with the transition from a good competitive team, to a good fun team. After playing the Jammers they'll look in the mirror and say "we aren't that team."

Pitches - Can't lose them all? Justin rolls out the red carpet on Jacked Up

Growlers - Queen Jess is all business tonight. In her business socks.

Superbad - Supa plays random for one inning, until they realize the Ligers "randomly" all have their players in normal positions. Supa then reverts back to arguing about calls, which is probably just as fun for them. They also win by like 15.

Alcoballics - Upset pick, and also there is a slight chance the 'Ballics are getting better now that Gorecki is on extended vacation. If they do win I'm sure Shocker Rob will tell us all how he was missing his best 30 guys.

TBN - Sit on My Base is turning into Shit on the Basepaths. Because that's what they did blowing a 4-0 lead over the Ligers. TBN wins.

Jess said...

I really hope that was a Flight of the Conchords reference, Chandler. "You lean in close and say something sexy like... "I might go to bed, I've got work in the morning", but I know what you're trying to say baby..."

If it wasn't, you suck.

JD said...

ToeJammers over Off Constantly: OC struggles with the transition from a good competitive team, to a good fun team. After playing the Jammers they'll look in the mirror and say "we aren't that team."

PBC over Jacked
It is rediculous for the commissioner to acknowledge that we did not participate in any bounty program yet still punish us by not suspending our coach. Josh Mornhinweg decided to buck conventional wisdom by loading our team with slow, awful people. With that being said, we do have several players on the prowl so Justin, Josh, Smithkey and Monius will bring their A-game and erections for JU.

Growlers d Jose
I'm sure someone will come up with a hilarious reference to moundpounding and growlers. I got nothing.

Ligers d SuperBad
Litman may still be upset over being upstaged in Ginnie by the unholy actions going on in the tent next to us. Moundpounding indeed. He brings his D- game and balls which is enough to distract the Procreators.

Shockers d Ballics
I met someone named Teneille (sp?) over the weekend who said she plays for the red team. That can't be good for them.

SOMB d Nuts
SOMB's only win was against the worst team in the league. Nuts at least beat the second worst.

trinihic said...

Can't we all just get a long... I had to sit in a car with FSU people chopping all weekend and some guy who is in love with Litman... Ohhh wait Missouri... I felt like I met Litman 2.0, I saw his ass within 5mins of being at the site (sorry Cody.. j/k) hahahaha
Anyway... here are my picks... Can there be an over/ under on a week where my name IS NOT in this damn blog!
Jammers
PBC
Growlers
Supa
Ballics
TBN

Peace out... see your faces tonight.. (Souder.. did I use "your vs. you're" correctly?? Did it pass your test...)

!! HOT TUB PARTY TODD !! said...

Cancelled vs Not Cancelled....
Not Cancelled


T.J.
Pitches Be Crazy
Growlers
Ligers
Shockers
SoMB

Chandler said...

Jess...

Totally was. I loved that show.

Litman said...

LOL T!

Paul said...

Jammers over OC - The Jammers realize that they only have 3 girls for tonight's game and Griff gets a quickie sex change. Since the GoKickball bylaws don't specify the ruling, Johnny must allow it.

PBC over Jacked Up - While Jacked Up's victory last week..umm..two weeks ago...fuck whenever we last played kickball, led me to a perfect pick selection, I've heard that rash that the Jammers gave them in week 1 has cleared up, bringing them back to their reality.

Growlers over JaMP - I think this game would be more productive if the Moundpounders forfeit and we use the time scheduled for the game to have a conference on what should be their official team acronym....and jager bombs of course.

Ligers over Superbad - people complain about the upset pick, but in any week has all the "favorites" won? Well, since I said that it will probably happen this week.

Shockers over the Ballics - I don't care who the Ballics play this week, I'd pick against them as a let down game after tieing the Jammers. Oh and they're playing them I said I'm picking until they lose

TBN over SoMB - Boring comment for a boring game

THE_Dawson said...

Jammers- BTW are still undefeated
PBC
Growlers
Ligers
Shockers
TBN

Smithkey said...

Breaking News: Teneille actually showed up to an event this past weekend at Ginnie Springs. After gracing us with her presence for a few minutes she disappeared to another site on the opposite side of the campgrounds and was not seen again until it was time to leave. Thanks for hanging out Teneille. On to my picks....

Jammers
Look for Griff to break out with a big game while he and the rest of the team rock the pink shirts. Why don't we have a national heart disease month?

Jacked Up
I don't know jack about this team but I do know that my team pretty much sucks. I will be surprised if a girl makes it on base the rest of the season. With myself not in the lineup tonight the chumps don't stand a chance.

Growlers
Growlers win because they play Jose. Nuff said!

Superbad
Do not give a shit about the game but am really tempted to go to the bar just to see the Liger girls in their new shorts.

Ballics
Like dem mighty #4 ranked Gators, the Ballics are taking on a new identity. Shockers can't win them all so this week is the best of any to put a notch in the loss column.

TBN
Had fun hanging out with them this weekend at Ginnie. Irrelevant to my picks but it's all I got.

Chris said...

Along, not a long

Nate Dawg said...

OC v Jammers

The OC got an extra week to think about their heartbreaking loss to Jacked Up. I have gone back and forth on this one but then it hit me that most of the Jammers replacement players are from Kickball Society and everyone knows that is the A-ball league when it comes to kickball in Tampa. OC regains its footing as a top tier team. Dawson - Jammers not undefeated after this week.

Jacked Up v Pitches Be Crazy
Jacked Up is primed for a let down game after their huge upset of OC last...errr two weeks ago? But with DeekSweat tempered with the cooler weather they beat PBC and their alledgedly slow girls easily.

Growlers v Jose
Jess also wearing her business cleats. Growlers normally get pounded by Jose but in a role reversal they get off their backs and do some pounding of their own.

Ligers v Superbad
Question is will the Ligers be participating in Supa's season long theme of a Suparandom lineup and fielding positions. I'm going with no and the fact that this is a trap game for Supa with the Sizzle right around the corner. Supa Frank and co. caught "Flo'ing" it.
Litman - Dawn has the best legs, duh. I'm reffing this game...take that however you want.

Shockers v Ballics
This new team to our league has some serious skills that the Ballics just cannot keep up with not matter where Gorecki and his old balls are. Rumor mill still has Rob working on a trade with the Ligers to get THE Todd for a half used bottle of KY.

TBN v SoMB
Matt to answer your question no I am not in mourning to the horrible FSU loss from last week. They are who I thought they were, I had a feeling they wouldnt show up for one of the weak ACC games and I was right. Hopefully we build from it and still have a shot at the ACC Championship. I never thought our team was a National Championship cailber club due to EJ's up and down QB play since he has come to FSU. I'm ready for him to graduate. Ok back to kickball...TBN wins a close one with strong defense and lots of infield singles.
Paul - you're a boring game...but I agree.
JW - I think my bad luck hit with the FSU game last week. Go Rams! Go Cards!

Fat Kid said...

Jammers
Jacked up
Growlers
Ligers
Shockers
TBN

Jess said...

Jammers v. OC
Jammers beat off constantly….especially Ruben.

Jacked Up v. PBC
Deeks is tired of this losing shit and asks his family to come out for a showing of moral support….and a shitload of Dobermans and pot. Innocent, girly Jacked Up is too concerned for their lives to worry about the game and PBC (finally) gets a Win.

Growlers v. MoundPounders
I imagined the commentary for this game going something like Tosh.O’s Twenty Seconds on the Clock bit. Unfortunately we’re all either too lazy or too lame with come up with funny quips so I’ll just say that in a shocking turn of events, the Growlers bust out the strap-on from the nightstand drawer and pound Jose’s mound tonight.

Ligers v. Superbad
Ligers try seducing Supa with their sexy shorts, but their plan backfires as they forget Frank (and most of the Supa dudes?) are married/taken men and instead have Litman and the rest of the Ligers slipping on their own drool.

Shockers v. Ballics
Ballics pulled out a tie against the most serious of all the kickball teams in the land. Tonight they play the second most serious. I’m hoping for a similar outcome – don’t let me down!!!!

TBN v. SoMB
Rappers v. Country Stars should be a fun game. I like both of these teams. Um…what else can I say. Nuts win.

Smooty said...

Jammers
PBC
Growlers
Ligers
Shockers
Nuts

E-FLO said...

Is QJ's call for a tie the first time in "Picks" history? She should get beer from everyone if she nails it.

Nate Dawg said...

Others have called ties in the past but have been forced to pick a team...we'll see what Chan does with her majesty...I say he lets her pick a tie

Chandler said...

No it's not, and we've never allowed it.

So I'm giving her the Ballics.

But if they tie I'll buy her a beer

Chandler said...

Ha! I do have balls! (until Jess yells at me)

Smithkey said...

I have tried to pick a tie before but Chandler put down his Nazi law and made me pick a team. Why not be allowed to pick a tie? If either team loses you are wrong. Down with Hitler!

Chandler said...

Cause it screwed up my excel "check" to make sure I didn't miss anyone's picks (since ties for everyone else are thrown out).

It's not impossible to allow it... but Vegas doesn't allow you to pick a tie.

Alison said...

Chan / Jess' picks.

Will see if I can log on for commentary before my plane boards.

Jess said...

Bastard! I shall have my court devise an appropriate punishment for such insubordination!

E-FLO said...

If we tie the newb team, Chandler gets nut-kicked by the entire Growler Nation

Chandler said...

That's going to be a lot of broken feet...

Capt. BeardFace said...

I skipped class to type these commentaries in on time, so I best make it count...

OC def Toe Jam
This game's balls are hangin' pretty low these days, yet I have only played the TJ twice(maybe once). Therefore, I will toss this game over to my Grandma on her birthday. She's says, "No One Can Beat Off Constantly." Who can argue with that logic?

PBC def Jacked Up
Rain destroys any momentum JU built up from whenever ago it was that we last played. PBC has had plenty of time to grow out some beards and gets in the Win column.

Growler Face def MoundPound
Everyone is too busy watching over there shit to pay attention to things like innings, outs, or the score. Ref just gives it to the Growl because they win the chug.

Superbad def Unicorns
Johnny kicks three ketchup bottles, then removes the local children from the fields for GKB to begin. Insert a "random" for some reason here.

Shockers def Alco's
If this game is played by the bay, and everyone is already at Y of A; does it still count?

Nuts der Face Sitters
I played against TBN last week and won 5-2. THEY rebound back this week.

You have now been BeardFaced.

Chandler said...

Boo! Pick an upset! Or you're getting Ligers

RÜBS said...

Jammers v. OC
OC went from 4/5 beard to face ratio to 2/5 beard to face ratio and so goes the OCness. Jammers are old and out of shape but ironically still in better shape than JW. Game of the week circa 2007.
Ruben beats off constantly…have you seen the fall talent level?

Jacked Up v. PBC
Field 2 will be flooded as Deeks Sweat is the em’body’ment standing water. Jacked Up your theme instantly becomes a wet DEEK-shirt contest.

Growlers v. MoundPounders
summer “champs” = or > rookie team

Ligers v. Superbad
‘funest’ game of the year. Forecast, medium to heavy eeyores.

Shockers v. Ballics
New jerseys…Balics dress for the job they want, competitive kickball team. Shockers, shockingly munt down third all night.

TBN v. SoMB
Can I buy a vowel Pat?

Winners:
Dylan, Dylan, Dylan, Dylan AND Dylan.