Friday, September 18, 2009

Rain Out?

So last night I was on my way home from work filled with excitement like a little Chan Chan on his way to Rollo's house to try out Rollo's new strap-on. I get an email from one Tyrus Gordon, Senior Customer Service Representative for WAKA Kickball that read, "Blah Blah Blah, Something Something, without Kickball I would have no life, blah blah blah, Rainout."

My immediate reaction was to steer my car back into one lane and to quit driving 80 mph with my knee. My second reaction was similar to Bito's when he walked in on Flo, Chan Chan, Rollo and Gorecki re-enacting the death scene from Donkey Punch. (Now available on Blu-Ray) HORROR!

After the initial shock wore off, and checking the sky for any rain in the area, which there wasn't, I was a little let down. But I decided that I was not going to let Ty ruin my plans for Thursday evening.

I got home, walked straight to my closet, put on my kickball getup, complete with sweatbands. Walked downstairs, grabbed my cooler from the pantry, walked to the fridge, grabbed two Delicious Miller Lites, filled my cooler with an additional 10 Miller Lites, and proceded down another set of stairs into my man cave (could not come across any gayer i know) and turned on the PS3.

I proceeded to go 15-0 with my Alma Matter, Miami University of Ohio, and black out after deciding in the National Championship game that I should start doing shots at the end of each qtr. (I had the game set on 5 min qtrs)

All of this, for those of you still reading, leads me to only one conclusion.

WE NEED A RAINOUT POLICY

I am not talking about, "Hey, its raining, no games tonight, see you next week." I am talking about, "Hey, Ty canceled our games, I was going to get wasted at KB, might as well meet up with everyone and get wasted anyways"

So here is my proposal, if Ty decides to ruin our fun again, we all agree to meet at Mac'd's at 730 and try to get as blacked out as possible. Or even have the teams that were supposed to play face-off in drinking games to decide the winner that week?

I know that some or most of you probably went to the bar anyways, but I am not as cool as you guys and no one called or txt'd (thanks nate) to tell me what was up... so in an effort to feel better about myself I think this policy would be beneficial to the comraderie of the league and I would feel less like an alchy for crushing a 12'er in my man cave by myself.

Discuss.

13 comments:

Chandler said...

haha. that is an epic recap of your night.

a bunch of us got to the bar around 8ish. nate was there and I saw him send out like 30 texts to people. I assumed you were one of them. haha

Grifter said...

I was not one of them...

I will cut you Nate.

Florian said...

How long have you been playing Grifter? Everyone knows the plan after a rainout is to meet up at Macs. The only question was at what time and about 8ish was decided. You really need to learn the unwritten rules of kickball. lol

YellowBird said...

I would have joined you guys but I was spending the evening with the lovely April Williams, whom has a softer touch than Chandler. Sorry I missed the bar shenanigans.

BTW, Grifter, I'm always curious if it's actually Ty's call or PAL's.

Chandler said...

rumor last night was that PAL called it off... somewhat prematurely (kinda like Kevin's ejaculations) due to their precious new, uneven sod.

Grifter said...

I can see how PAL might have called it. I know that Ty gets the bad wrap. I want to go out there with a steam roller and flatten the fields... or maybe we can get them to put in Next-turf?

Chandler said...

yeah maybe we should have "Hug Your Ty" day at the fields. just to let him know it's going to be OK.

Grifter said...

That might work, but I think I will stick with doing nothing.

Irish said...

I'd say it was def PAL that called it, they prob didnt want the 4 foot grass getting messed up!

bull said...

So you blacked out after a 12 pack?!?! That's weak! You need to step up your game buddy!

Grifter said...

Bull, Re-read the post. I blacked out after 12 beers and 5 shots of Patron.

Also, I drank my dinner.

But Also Also, I am a bit of a lightweight.

Also Also Also I am envious of your drinking abilities.

Nate Dawg said...

LOL sorry Grifter...I sent texts out to Beer Nuts and people text me about what was going on I text them back. I will make sure I text you the next time we have a rainout...

Jared said...

Also Also Also Also -
Bull's drinking abilities are quite ridiculous.