Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Picks Week 1




Alright since Chandler has decided he is too cool for school and has better "things" to dedicate his time and efforts to - either that, or is he tired of putting up with you ungrateful sonsofbitches - I will try this Picks thing until we all stop coming up with funny things to say.  Commence Picks!!!!

Teneille and Kyle owe Paul and Litman some (1?) drink? Something like that. Not like they will ever get them anyways.



23 comments:

Paul said...

Is it just me or was the first week match ups designed to be as competitive as possible? With that being said, I'm giving my preseason rankings while making picks....multitasking....while working......tripletasking?

#1 Growlers over #2 Superbad

With the absence of the Jammers and the Shockers, the Growlers inherit the douchebags of the league crown.

#3 Ligers over #4 Ballics

Rumor has it that Litman ran a successful coupe for Chandler's captaincy of the Ligers. So in true Litman fashion they'll start off strong but dwindle in the long run.

#5 Beer Nuts over #6 PBC

PBC is too busy basking in their crystal pitcher to get ready for this game

#7 OAOTF over #8 Free ballers

Don't know anything about these teams, so I'll select the team that will allow us to argue all season about their official acyronm

Jess said...

Litman drove a two-door car to overthrow Chandler as captain of the Ligers? Regardless, thanks for starting us off ;)

Kyle said...

whoa whoa whoa Paul...don't be so quick to crown the Growlers as the douchebags of the league. We Ballics will surely throw our hats into the ring by the third inning of Week 1. People already hate us for wanting the tournament changed...apparently some asshole is getting married on May 4th.

Super
Alco
TBN
Freeballers

Paul said...

Thanks for backing up the claim of the Growlers being the douchebags of the league Jess.

Jess said...

Haha, my douchebaginess does not discriminate against my own kind. And Kyle, I don't think Ballics got the tournament changed - to my understanding the league voted for the 11th but Johnny didn't QC his e-mail before sending it out. Commish- can you confirm or deny?

!! HOT TUB PARTY TODD !! said...

NICE Jess,

here they are:

TBN
Freeballers
GROWLERS
Ligers

and don't forget your WAKA picks, with 24 teams, the stakes are HIGH:

7:00 PM::
Field 1 1.21 Kickawatts!
Field 2 Pick Me Off
Field 3 Shockers
Field 4 Great Balls of Fire
Field 5 Your Balls My Foot
Field 6 Zombie Apocalypse

8:00 PM::
Field 1 Balls n Dolls
Field 2 Seminoles
Field 3 BALLS DEEP
Field 4 Breaking Balls
Field 5 La Flama Blanca
Field 6 She'll Call Me

Smooty said...

Thee Beer Nuts over PBC
This one is pretty obvious. TBN is coming off of a great run in last season’s tournament. PBC on the other hand hasn’t won a game since I wasn’t a cripple, which was a long, long time ago. TBN wins big.

OAOTF over FreeBallers
We should throw Jose and the Moundpounders into this game and have a 3 way cripple fight. New teams always suck. Always. Hopefully they are fun and drink a lot.

Growlers over Superbad
Growlers start off their undefeated, championship winning season with a shutout win over the hapless, depleted Superbad squad. Missy’s deep-down longing desire to become a growler will become more apparent tonight.

Ballics over Ligers
Some old-school ballics coming out of retirement. Fortunately for them, one of those people isn’t OMG. Ligers still should have a good team this season, but not good enough to overcome the ghosts of the ballic’s past.

Chandler said...

Here are my picks:
















Jess said...

PBC v. TBN
Since Josh (and I’ll assume the rest of the Pitches) apparently has no social calendar they’ve been practicing all off season as they aim for the rare dual Tournament & Crystal Pitcher Champions trophy. But rumor has it they are pre-gaming at Stoney’s beforehand so that means Deeks will be a drunk, sweaty mess before the game even starts. That, coupled with the fact that TBN is riding high from a near tournament win leads the Nuts to victory.

Overcoming Adversity on the Field (OAF) v. Free Ballers
OAF - c’mon guys, it’s so obvious. Agree with Smooty that hopefully these newbies are fun and like to drink. Maybe they’re good at flip cup since that’s likely the only chance they’ll have to pick up a W when playing anyone other than each other.

Growlers v. Superbad
Not sure who is left on Supa but I know CJ is so that means crazy side arm pitching and an excessive amount of bitching from both benches, especially the Growler side. After all, we are vying for the coveted Asshole of the League crown which I’m pretty confident we will win by a landslide.

Ligers v. Alcoballics
This should be a good cage match. On one hand you have Kyle rallying his Ballics as contenders for the Asshole of the League crown (I think you’ll need at least 2 eruptions from Mt. E-Flo for that to happen) and on the other you have Litman inspring his Ligers with a rivoting “Fuck the Ballics” chant, not to mention other tensions that have arisen over the off season….I’ve been going back and forth on this one in my head all morning when suddenly I realized – no one gives a shit about Picks!  Ballics win a close one but regardless of the outcome this week or the rest of the season no one gets a wheel of cheese or a gently used Boston Market giftcard…the blog is dying and it’s up to every single one of you to make a difference in our kickball world!!! There are exactly 69 (haha) people who have posting rights! Don’t stand idly by while our blog suffers a slow and agonizing death!! VIVA EL BLOG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Litman said...

First of all my truck has 4 doors Jess. Secondly, there isn't any real hatred for the Ballics, it's just fun, games, and sarcasim....or is it?
Lastly, fuck PBC, their practices, and their stupid trophy they didn't deserve. The Ligers will deserve the trophy and not win it, and frankly we don't give a damn. PBC did a tiny little gathering at Ricks On The River and The Ligers had just as many people show up as their team. Since then we've done a 16 person 9 mile canoe trip, a 20 person dinner at Koto, and about a half dozen gang bangs.
TBN, Adversity, Growlers, Ligers.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xSQxtMWJzGQ

Paul said...

Jess,

I picked the Ligers not the Ballics, please correct the spreadsheet. I don't want there to be any confusion when I win, otherwise people might not know who they should neglect to buy a beer for later.

Josh said...

4 doors and only one door handle, Litman.

Litman said...

It's so the women can't get out.

JD said...

It appears this blog, like the league and Litman's dignity, is done. Now I'll have to actually listen to the conference calls.

TBN d PBC
Our automatic outs are back for another season, so we'll give the short people a reason for living. We will quickly taint our enthusiastic rookies.

FB d Adversity
Johnny is so desperate for teams he had to recruit from Make-a-Wish. Free Ballers will wish they remembered their drawers when they see the hood we play in.

Growlers d Superbad
The Creepy Bearded Midget is now in charge, so we're all hoping to see more entertaining outbursts on the sidelines.

Ligers d Ballics
Winner gets Dawn in the divorce.

Kyle said...

Jess,

similar to Paul, you reversed my pick for the Ligers/Ballics game...Ballics win, most likely by 3 runs.

Let the farewell tour begin for Duc, Buchanan, Jefe, Russ, me and others...gifts are encouraged, preferably hookers and blow.

DPT! said...

CJ emailed in his picks due to account issues:

--------------

TBN over PBC
TBN riding on the nice tournament run of last year and is bringing back a few old faces (Charlie aka as The Count) to make there team even stronger. One win for TBN. One!… ha…ha…ha


Free Ballers over Overcoming Adversity
Two new teams I have never seen play. Since I like the idea of Free Balling (lets face it. it fells good) im going to go with the Free Ballers for the win. As for the other teams name hell I can hardly spell much less put together a sentence. Go Gators but damn it’s too long. (that’s what she said) Also someone told me the Free Ballers have some hot ladies? Not sure if this is true but just in case…. Sup Ladies.

Growlers over Superbad

I can’t believe I just typed this, but the Growlers are coming back with a full head of steam and are trying to take over the douchebags of the league title. They call every pitch I throw side arm and I walk like 10 runs in.


Ballics over Ligers

With the E-Flo farewell tour in full effect bringing back all the oldie but goodie playas of years past the Ballics beat down the Ligers easy. Should be a fun game though.

Nate Dawg said...

Lazy and dont feel like commentary today...
Growlers
Ligers
TBN
FreeBallers

Nate Dawg said...

Elfo's farewell tour has been 4 seasons running now...

trinihic said...

I'm back and here goes:

Super
Alco
TBN
Freeballers

Pretty much same as Kyle :)

Alison said...

Pitches Be Crazy v. THEE Beer Nuts
TBN has some solid players and will easily take down PBC tonight. Crushing Brew has stepped it up to crushing dreams…Crazy Pitches dreams, that is. Lots of sweating and lots of fun to be had on both sides.

Overcoming Adversity on the Fields v. Free Ballers
Not a clue about either of these teams. Glad these two teams are playing each other the first game, though. It will give them a chance to battle it out and for one of them to taste victory before they inevitably lose for the rest of the season. I’m hoping for fun players; the ones I met at the meet-and-greet seemed cool. Rubs says that one of these teams has hot girls. Maybe they’re the new Jacked Up…? Coin toss here: Free Ballers? They have at least two vets.

Growlers v. Superbad
Considering many of us have been playing kickball for too long, and have plenty of attitude (but you will always be the Queen, Feisty Catcher ;) ), I think there will be league-wide competition for that asshole crown this season. If CJ gets a little too douchey with his side-arm pitching tonight Big John might just storm the field and throw CJ in the bay. Which would be….totally awesome. While Supa has lost a lot of players, Growlers haven’t lost their edge. Growlers dominate.

Alcoballics v. Ligers
This should be a decent game…on the field. The Ligers have some good players, that’s for sure. Litman has made no secret that he’s ready to kick some ass and shed that cuddly Liger image. The Ballics, on the other hand, have their reunion/farewell tour in full effect so you can expect a whole lot of “don’t cares” and drinking beer. The Ligers won by one run the last time these two teams played but we played with a much different roster. Hopefully we can put it together tonight and take the W. I don’t predict a blow out, but I’m going to take the Ballics in a squeaker.

Alison said...

LOL at Nate's comment on the 4-season farewell tour. Yup, but I think this is the final-final.

Nate Dawg said...

Eflo's retirement is not neat.

Jess said...

Damn just realized I messed up more picks. Ugh this is hard. Now I see why Chandler quit lol